CONTRADICTION

Used to be torn
Right in two
Pieces of me strewn all over
After a life time with you
After a life time of your hate
I discovered to love instead of hate
You tried to break me
You’re the one now torn
Bits of you lay scattered
Tossed about haphazardly
By your own hand
You chose this for your destiny

I am not the one
Laying naked on the floor
I am now the one
Clothed in another man’s love
You said so many damned times,
“I love you”
And I not once believed you
Because your balled up fists
Spoke way more than your words
” I love you,” you said
By your side, I always felt dead
Your love was in question
Every single day I shared my life with you

For you see: To love is to clothe
To hate is to expose
To love is to compose
To hate is to dethrone
To love is to protect
To hate is to defraud
To love is to secure
To hate is to unhinge
To love is to embrace
To hate is to cast aside
And cast me aside you did
To love is to kiss
But all you knew how to give
Were the fake kisses of Judas the traitor high priest
To love is to bless
To hate is to curse
And you did curse me with your fake confessions of love
To love is to be honest
To hate is to lie
To love is to see
To hate is blindness
To love is to feel
My love for you always chose to see past your evil delusions

I don’t miss you
I don’t miss us because you and me never became us
You were and still are YOU
I am me, still searching for my us…but never again with you.
I am fine now
No longer torn am I
No longer naked and bound on the floor
My faith has come back stronger than before
I am growing whole
I’ve nothing left to lose
Because even though you cost me a great deal
I soar daily as an eagle
Arising daily from my smoldering ashes
And my heart has found a home
A home worthy of my heart
A heart worthy of my home
And daily I fly to meet him…http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co6WMzDOh1o

EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2014

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