Frailty is a funny thing. It talked her into a compromising situation. When she was strong she would proclaim “ I will never do that! “ . In her might she could scale a wall bare footed and topple several giants with her hand tied behind her back. She seemed invincible.
Now things are different. Battles have scarred her and she feels herself wavering. What was once firm ground now has turned into sinking sand. She said she would never stumble in matters of her heart and she did just that because weakness is peculiar. Her flaws continually beg for her attention. She looks in the mirror and where once stood a Jedi, now all she gazes at are the accusatory fingers that point to her and blame her for things that aren’t even her doing. That was her undoing back then and she wonders if it’ll contribute to her demise now.
She heard those voices back then and that’s how she lost her way. They drowned out her own voice and she followed the wrong ones, betraying herself. Now the image in the mirror begs her not to do it again. She is fragile and is succumbing more and more each day to what is comfortable because she has grown tired of the battles.
The conflict is in her soul and she knows there is a way out but she finds herself enjoying the darkness more than she thought possible. Being in the light this whole time has exhausted her. She finds opacity comforting, it’s where she can hide away, not having to worry so much about anything. The darkness beckons her daily; it is where light hasn’t reached yet. Those places longing for light’s exposure is where she treads lately. What she doesn’t realize is that as she visits those places, they are no longer in the dark because by illumination, they become won over territory.
Her darkness sees the light and it comprehends it not. It surrenders to the brilliance and that’s how she overcomes her weakness.
“It’s not by might nor power but by my Spirit,” says the Lord.
” Sin is basically the places of the heart where The Light hasn’t reached yet.” -Kim Clement
She thought the menacing clouds in the distant horizon could only mean one thing: Her certain destruction. She feared being obliterated in to oblivion. So Rosalma battened down the hatches of her sail boat and prepared for the worst. Oh she had seen it coming from afar for a while. Having been in control of her situations all of her life she always knew what to do. But there was something different with these dark clouds she kept seeing approaching closer everyday; esta tormenta es distinta,this storm is different, she told herself. She knew it was bigger than any rain storm she’d ever experienced before. Rosalma knew it, could feel it down to her core. But she decided not to run. She knew whatever came, even if she were to be stripped of her sails and tossed about in turbulent waters, she’d make it…at least she asked SOURCE every night for strength.
The day the deluge came started out in a strange calm. Rosalma looked out of her 2nd story bedroom window and she knew the light breeze and sun playing in the clouds above were lies. She had seen what was coming. Suddenly the day grew overcast and the thunder rolled. Her heart skipped a beat. Should she stay and weather the storm or go out to meet it face to face?
She gathered her long copper toned locks in a messy pony tail, threw on her fisherman’s sweater over her jeans and boots; grabbed her back pack and headed out to the marina. The clouds were building and the hues of grey changed constantly from grey to charcoal; reflecting her fears. Undaunted, Rosalma , was going for it. She knew in the storm lay her destiny.
Vamomos Chica! GO girl, she encouraged herself. She found her sail boat; she’d christened her ALMA after her abuela, grandma who’d walked the earth for 98 years and taught Rosalma all about the storm. Rosalma headed out in Alma to find her soul’s purpose.
The water was choppy and the air now nippy. Rosalma tightened her raincoat a bit more snugly around her petite 5.2 frame. The water was merciless and kept over powering the deck. But, Rosalma kept on. She knew destiny’s end was ahead and staying where it’s safe would never get her there.
Soon enough the storm was beating Rosalma up and knocking her around, with fists the size of the Hulk’s. Every time she thought it would let up, the struggle intensified. She desperately looked up for any sign of her tomentor letting up and the storm today seemed relentless. It wasn’t quitting and neither was Rosalma. Mid storm Rosalma’s spirit was sinking. She thirsted and no drop of water could satiate it. Water everywhere and none of it could quench. Water everywhere and nothing to stop the stench of hell’s flames. She wept and couldn’t tell where her tears began or ended. Her eyes swollen from the storm’s continuous beatings, felt like she was blind. She wanted to just lay there and give up and admit defeat on Alma’s deck. Who would blame her for quitting? Obviously this storm no man woman or child could overcome. So the minutes slipped away and her soul with them.
Until a light came from a light house. It was far off but the light shining from it was undeniable. Rosalma shot up to her feet. She steadied herself by grabbing on to a side rail. All of the sails on Alma now torn to bits; which hung on like rags on a homeless person. Her soul knew how that felt. She had seen the light ; though it was faint, she knew her destination to Port Désirée was just ahead. Through the rain storm came peace.
So what now? ALMA was not tossed about anymore. The storm’s rage was lessening and the wind no longer howled in distress. The light tower was in full view straight ahead. Rosalma shook a little inside. What lay ahead for her? She had left it all behind; brought absolutely no baggage on this journey. She wanted to travel light and get places faster. But now with all that was familiar to her gone, she knew not what she’d face next.
Through the rain storm came peace and Rosalma knew it was all well worth facing the storm that threatened to finish her off as it had done to so many of her ancestors. This new place was like a new addiction she could not deny. The light here seemed blinding only becase she had been in doom and gloom for so long. Rosalma was here to stay. This new place of color and no grey was where she would stay…
Dear people who were spared and did not take the _AXX: It’s not our job to judge our fellow human beings who did so. We’re all at different levels of ascension ;if you consider yourself as better than someone who fell for that lie, what does that say about you?
I was amongst the many who were taunted and jeered, when I would go into a public place unmasked. I could see real fear in plain view peering at me through the eyes of the masked face who was berating me; their virtue signaling and humiliating stares fell flat. So freakin’ what? Weren’t some of us taught to turn the other cheek: to forgive them for they know not what they do, neither do they know Him?
Even when the fight was in my own home amongst my family members, I was faced with having to apply those same principles of faith. Like many of us, I was even mocked by some of my adult children when I was so bold as to opt out of masking up when we would go out together; setting me straight and implying they didn’t want to be seen with a tin foil hat wearer.
But I knew as I continue to KNOW whose I am and I refused to punch back because the insults of those insulting me fell on Him, KJS , who took it all in my stead and still does so to this day! So I never defended myself because I consider myself to be in close union with Him, who fights my battles for me when I stand back fully TRUSTING Him.
Having done ALL in my power, I’ve stood and let my Redeemer validate me. I was even considered a nut job when I’d hug my masked and booster-ed clients when they’d openly share their trepidation and panic; wondering if they had chosen the right option not only for themselves and for their children. I have held them in my arms, regardless of their shedding status and gave them a quiet hug instead of harsh critiques.
We ALL must be stepping up our LOVE WALK, now more than at any time in our history! We won’t heal the masses using mere words.
FAITH IS ACTION!
LOVE IS ACTION!
That’s what we’re called to BE and DO right now!
I hope to see you joining the ranks of those of us already doing so!!
You have to love yourself in a healthy, balanced manner. You can’t give to others what you don’t have. When you reject yourself, your setbacks grow worse.How do you overcome that? You must go to the root of the problem and learn to accept yourself, fully.
Not liking yourself causes you to blame others for your mishaps. Surrender your weaknesses to SOURCE/ God and work on your strengths. Admit to your flaws but don’t focus on them. Let Source help you grow instead. Don’t hide what you aren’t good at. The people you need to help you, will manifest. BE who you are and let others be who they are. Lighten up and allow others to be themselves! SOURCE/ God would rather that you be someone who makes mistakes and has a right heart, than someone who has a perfect record of performance.
What you DO is not who you are; you are loved for both! Instead of always saying, ‘I’m weird’ why don’t you change it up and say, ‘I’m fearfully and wonderfully made and that makes me unique!’ Some people don’t like themselves and they don’t know it; they are distant from themselves.
No matter what Hold your head up If the wind took your hat Hold your head up If the rain drowned out your daisies Hold your head up If the moon fell out of your sky and all is pitch black Hold your head up If the trees fall upon the dwelling you fought so hard to obtain Hold your head up If someone won’t let go your Eggo Hold your head up If they smeared your name with bullshit lies Hold your head up If you gave away your dignity ’cause you didn’t know any better Hold your head up No matter what Hold your head up!
Eva Santiago 