Tag: Relationships

365 Snap Shots of Life: Day 136

FORCED to FIND MY FAMILY…

I was certain I would never know the love of a mother for myself. God has a wonderful way of completing us when we least expect it and with the most unlikely people. I have been friends with Margaret for 20 years. We met back in Atlanta at a time when I would not allow myself to peek into my damaged,trauma filled past. Margaret came into my life back then with arms opened.

She would look at me with such warmth,enough to begin the process of melting the glacier that was taking over my heart in those days. She knew what I needed emotionally and freely gave it;for the first time in my early 20’s I experienced a mother’s unconditional love and I craved for more.Much like a new-born in dire need at feeding time.

My heart broke when a few years after meeting her our lives changed,sending both of us in different directions temporarily. Like everything else in my life,I embraced the new changes ,still clinging to Margaret even from afar.

A few years ago I reconnected with her and I felt great to have been able to become re-acquainted with another member of my family. Ever since then I have chosen to call her Mamacita because she  embodies  everything I have ever imagined about having my mother.

Have you been ostracized by your own blood relatives as I have been? We all have choices to make. We can stay bitter in our isolation or the alternative is to open our hearts to the people who God sends into our lives to give us the family we need. I chose to forgive and stay open to what God has for me. People get blessed with good looks,good genes,talents wealth and strong family ties. I was not one of the fortunate who comes from a loving family;this set
me on a course that forced me to search out and find a family of my own. And I have,through my friends.

Fear will hold some of us bound ,keeping us from opening our hearts to those who offer to love us.We all come into this world in dire need of love;yet few of us are brave enough to admit our need to ourselves and to others.

Mamacita,thank you for offering me your cup! It was you who offered a drink from your over flowing vessel;to this dusty,weary,thirsty traveler. Cheers to you and I will forever be thankful that you did! Had you not offered, I would not have had the courage to ask you for a drink!
Te amo…tu hija

-Eva Santiago copyright 2012

365 Snap Shots of Life: Day 95

Today started out quite disappointing but along the way I managed to pull myself up by my bootstraps…with a little help of course!  First I was disappointed about something I was really looking forward to doing soon but it’s on hold for now. Then later on in the day I found out some disappointing news. I had enough of it and I decided to take a long nap. Then my daughter invites me out for a late lunch early dinner which I guess you could call it “brinner” 🙂

Sometimes God wants to bless you through your kids and I say let them! Don’t be proud, humble yourself and receive their blessing, they’re just trying to give back a little of what you gave them.

Walking home from the Mexican restaurant we ate at, my daughter asks me,” What is honorable these days mom?” I want to share a list of things I believe are honorable and if you come up with some of your own, good for you!

WHAT IS HONORABLE:

1. Working your problems out with a difficult spouse so your children can see that there are adults who care enough to work things out. This also shows them marriage is no picnic at times.

2. Honoring your dreams by pursuing them.

3. Telling the truth even if you risk losing someone.

4.Telling your kids the truth instead of always acting like everything is fine and trying to protect them. Your kids see right through you anyways and they know you’re only protecting yourself. Also, no one was ever hurt from knowing too much truth; it’s the lies that do the most damage.

5. Telling some one you love them even if they don’t reciprocate it.

6. Being able to love that person who hurt and traumatized you.

7. Forgiving yourself fully.

8. Embracing yourself with all of your quirks.

9. Not running away from life.

10. After a relationship dies, still having hope that you will find love again.

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 10

Please refer back to my earlier posts and read what this challenge is about so that the later posts make sense. :)

Day 10 Question 10: What was the most mischievous thing you can recall doing as a child?

Answer: This memory always makes me chuckle because I really didn’t like my cousin I had to grow up with. He was always mean to me, so it felt good when this happened. We were vacationing in the south of Spain. My uncle was in the Air Force so while we were stationed in Germany, every summer we traveled around in Spain.

We had stayed the night in Rosas

 

a tiny, picturesque beach town. Tio (Uncle) had us get up around 5 am so we could get an early start. I was ready to go and when I knocked on my uncle’s hostel room door he told me to get the others up. My cousin was with me so we went to knock on the door of the friends we were traveling with. I  knocked on the door several times and nothing happened. So I walked away leaving my cousin there, who was still half asleep.

I went back into my room to get my belongings and then I heard a huge commotion. I poked my head out and there was an elderly man standing outside the door I had just knocked on. He was blasting my cousin out in French. I froze for a minute not getting the full picture. Then suddenly I understood what I’d done. I let my cousin take the fall and I was giggling like crazy. The upset French man slammed the door in my cousin’s face right when I walked up. My cousin looked at me in total bewilderment and I never explained to him what had just happened. Payback is hell baby!

F-E-A-R

F-E-A-R

Fear is false evidence appearing real. Think of it, fear lies to you and tries to keep you where you think you’re safe but you’re really not. There are different kinds of fear; there is the healthy fear or respect that you have to teach a young child about not touching a hot stove with their hand or they’ll get burned.

Then there is the fear of God; it’s not that you fear Him because you’re afraid he might squash you like a bug. This fear is more of a respect out of an acknowledgement that HE is God and you’re not.

The kind of fear I’m talking about is the fear that paralyzes a person and keeps them trapped as in a cage.It lies to you telling you not to trust anyone because there’s no good people out there. Another lie it whispers is the “you’re jus not good enough” and “you’ll never be anything”. This kind of fear alienates you and keeps you from forming healthy relationships with others. In the end you end up destroyed by the very thing you feared.

The one thing that conquers fear is LOVE. God is Love; love is God. His perfect love annihilates fear; it renders it obsolete. Did you know that the human brain was wired for love? We were not designed for fear!! SO if you are living afraid it’s because you are allowing fear to rule and not love. It’s so black and white, it’s simple. We either live in hate or in love, but we cannot do both.