Happy 2018!!
Thank you to all my faithful readers who still follow this blog 🙂
What a roller coaster of a year 2017 was. I’m looking forward to things slowing down a bit so that I can savor the moment!
I’m also studying a lot and my writing is on an upward growth curve. I’m back so don’t think that I’ve abandoned this blog that I started back in the summer of 2011. My oh my, how time flies when we’re having fun!
Eva Santiago COPYRIGHT 2018
We are such strange creatures!
We have to leave, to miss, and to be missed
We need space,to feel closer to our loved ones
We have to give, to receive
We have to die, to live
We have to have known loss, so we can appreciate
We have to have known darkness,so we can shine brightly through our being
We have to have been lost, to know the warm feeling of being loved and accepted
We have to be orphaned, in order to be adopted
We have to have tasted great hatred, so we can become great lovers
We have to have been buried, so we can sprout back up to life
We have to have been cut deeply and wide open, for blood to gush out, ushering in true healing
We have to have been cut, in order to be sutured
We have to have seen chaos, to appreciate harmony
We have to have heard cacophony, so we can hear beautiful sounds….
EVA SANTIAGO COPYRIGHT 2015
What is this tear in my heart?
My heart is shredded
I can’t even remember when it tore for the very first time; let alone the most recent
After all’s been said and done: I’m OK!
And after all that keeps coming my way: I’m OK!
Our hearts were made to withstand a lot more wear and tear than we want to admit
To love without measure
To love with a reckless abandon, is the way we were meant to love
Or, forget it and don’t even love at all
To love with all kinds of conditions, regulations and stipulations
Is no love at all
To love with a reckless abandon is to get your heart shredded
Once your heart ‘s been through the wood chipper
You are different for always….
Eva Santiago copyright 2015
The making up of your mind is a slow process
Everyday you make up your mind
A confrontation
A Decision
Must be made
Up ahead
At the place where the road turns
You must decide
No one leaves a marriage
On the spur of the moment
You don’t pull the plug
On some one on life support
On a split second decision
Big out comes are decided
Long before they happen….
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2014
Mas es amar
To love is more
Is it better to hide love
To keep it to yourself
Instead of giving it all away?
But for what good is love
If you hide it
Who will benefit
From hidden love
Love makes you suffer
Love makes you bleed
Love makes you ache
If it doesn’t
Count on it: It’s all fake
Mas es amar
To love is more
More than a sunset
More than much-needed summer rain
More than a kiss
More than an embrace
Mas es amar
To love is more
Way more than we could ever comprehend
We label it
We try to define it
Trying to define love
Is like trying to nail jello to the wall
For you see, love is a vast universe
Infinite
Endless
Bottomless
Love songs fail at describing it
Yet they do help us feel it a little more
Music pulls love from the intangible
And makes it a little more tangible
No one language can convey its entire meaning
Spanish
Portuguese
The Romance tongues all help us understand it with all of our flowery words
But never forget
Mas es amar
To love is more when it costs you your all.
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2013
The worst thing in this existence is to not have been seen by the man who claimed to have loved me
You, loved me??
Seriously,do you know what love is?
Love is beyond a feeling
Love is a force
Love gives life
Love is beyond lust
Now do you get it?
True love reciprocates
True love intermingles
True love never hates
I deserve to know
Why you claimed to have loved me
When all I could ever feel was your hate
You bought me things
In attempts to satisfy my larger than life soul
You fool!
You never knew ME!!!
The worst thing in my existence is when you claimed your love for me when you haven’t a clue as to what love is
I asked you for one thing
It wasn’t material
You knew you wouldn’t give it
So you played me
‘Til the day I woke the hell up!
You’re a careless soul
Cruising through life
You drop people and shatter them into a billion bits
You trample them as on a trampoline
People for you are mere objects
The kindnesses of the cruel are oh so cruel
Your kind deeds are always from the dark side
Rendering them null and void in heaven’s bank account
And my whole world didn’t stop because you caused me to stumble
Stumble I did, and for you, I didn’t fall
For I knew who you were from day one
I’d seen you before in all the old, haunted places of my broken past
I chose you because all I knew was broken
And I figured you couldn’t break what was already shattered
I am strong…me you couldn’t scatter
So the worst thing in my existence is having chosen to live with the ghosts from my past;
All of which you so well embodied
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2013
Dear readers I normally don’t publish posts with profanity in them. Please excuse me as I don’t aim to offend anyone of you with this post. At times decent,clean words will fail us and the more appropriate word needed to express the intensity of the emotion will be a swear word. Whether you agree or not makes no difference. Thanks for your understanding
-Eva
FOX and HOUND
They met as children
When their universe was new
She held the stars
In her deep-set eyes
She knew nothing of meanness and lies
The fox and hound
These two grew and grew
A friendship formed
From 2 seeds planted in the ground
The years went on
Characters were set in place
While she played with dolls and lace
He’d take a thousand beatings in his face
They pledged a friendship’s love
He said he’d forever have her back
They pledged a friendship’s love
Promised he would never slack
And she trusted the fox
With her very life she did
Threw caution to the seven winds
Only to end up in a box
The one who pledged to have her back
Was nowhere to be found
That night the predator came
He did not stop him
He did worse than doing nothing
He took his turn in his best friend‘s rape.
And my heart weeps with hers
And my heart aches with hers
For how can a mother have stopped this?
The rape of her own child
And justice will do nothing
Not a fucking thing will be done
For all the laws men write
Are all stacked up against her
The laws of this land are perverse
Everything is ass backward
Progress travels in reverse
For you see the laws say,” She asked for it.”
And justice will do nothing
Not a fucking thing will be done
For all the laws men write
Are designed to undermine her
You didn’t just rape my child
You stole from all of us
You violated our way of life
Run like hell before God takes yours
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2013
Roam if you want to.
Go where you want to.
Feel what you want, or don’t.
See what you want or, don’t.
Say what you want,or don’t.
Laugh only if it’s funny to you.
Cry only if it moves you.
Own yourself and be proud of yourself.
Hug if you want to or don’t.
Kiss if you feel like it or don’t.
Dance in the rain or don’t.
Walk when you feel like walking and don’t let anyone make you run if you don’t want to.
Share only if you want to because sometimes there are things that only belong to you.
Say no when you want to.
Say yes only when you want to.
Say, “ I love you.” Only when you want to and not because it was expected of you.
Be shy when you want to and when you want to be bold do it.
Be true only to you and own your truth.
Dance with someone or alone-but do it anyway.
Go where there are people or stay in alone.
Look at the sunset or don’t.
Write a love letter and keep it forever or not.
Write a love story and share or take it to your grave.
Compose a love song and sing it or not.
Whatever you do, do it for you!
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2013
Para que la vida
What is life for?
Is it for you?
Is it for me?
Is it for living in fear?
Is it for the selfish?
Is it for the selfless?
Para que la vida?
What is life for?
Photos are proof that we lived
That we had an existence
That people were by our side
And sometimes we loved them from a distance.
Para que la vida?
What is life for?
If you’re not with the one you love
Is life worth living?
Sure it is
Because none of us always get what we want
For me life is forever worth living
Para que la vida?
What is life for ?
EVA SANTIAGO COPYRIGHT 2013
She reached out and no one was there
Her hand stretches out
And all around is a void
She retrieves it
The emptiness kills
Her hope wavers
Like a flickering flame
Passion is trapped
Deep
Way
Down
It hurts
It stews
It brews
Adeepache
From whose clutches
Youcannotescape
P
A
S
S
I
O
N
Is a no man’s land
A place of no return
The few who survive it
Leave their heart’s ashes in an urn
The rest of us live in her clutches
A child is born from the passion of two
The artist’s canvas is covered
In many a hue
The artist’s passion seldom understood but by a few
Then there is the passion of the widower
He buried her a spell ago
In a cold charcoal coffin
Next to his childhood love
Who grew wings and flew to the heavens above
The passion of unrequited love is the cruelest of all:
To love only to see none of it returned
By one who knows of that love
By one so trapped by fear
His love grew wings and flew to the heavens above
Where he thought it would be safe
Where he thought no one would go
Then one day he saw-
Her-
Standing there right where he left her
And he grew much afraid
Leaving her behind was his biggest mistake
And now all these years later
High mileage in his soul
His fears drowned her
Deep
Way
Down
Deepinsidehim
That sort of passion
Is one you never recover from
Just like a strange fashion
You try to own it and wear it
And it never suits you
Aaahhhh but if only you’d listen to your heart
That sort of passion
Is where your life should end and not start
EVA SANTIAGO copyright 2013
